by Dolores G. Wix
First, do something that will improve the way you look such as a
new haircut, hair color, new makeup, or new clothing. Or all of
them! When you look good, you feel more confident! Also, give
attention to the way you stand and move. Not only is it a message
to the outside world, more importantly, it is a message to yourself.
If you feel that it doesn't matter how you walk or how you stand,
then, in effect, you are saying that you don't matter. Walk and
stand as if you mattered and as if you are honoring yourself.
Self-confidence and self-respect go hand-in-hand. So be willing
to do things that will help you gain and retain respect for yourself.
You must also be willing to respect others. It may be necessary
to cut out the people in your life who don't allow you to feel positive
about yourself. Your self-confidence can evaporate or flourish
depending on the people you accept into your life. Surround
yourself with people who show by their actions that they care about
you and have your best interests at heart.
Avoid comparing yourself with other people and measuring yourself
by someone else's standards. Learn to love, appreciate and value
yourself. There is no one in the universe like you. Each of us has
value and something to offer. Find your personal purpose and
mission in life. The biggest confidence builder, in my opinion, is
doing the work you feel passionate about and that utilizes your
unique talents and abilities. It is hard to have confidence in
yourself if you hate the work you do or if you are not good at
You might find this hard to believe, but being laid off could be a
blessing in disguise. It gives you an opportunity to reevaluate
your life and decide in which direction you would like to go. Dont
know where to start? Why not take a personality test to see which
career path is best for you. See the "Resources" chapter under
"Personality Tests" for web sites that offer tests you can take.
Try to get involved in some meaningful work as soon as possible,
even if it's only on a volunteer basis. Use your expertise to benefit
people and/or organizations. You can now volunteer without even
leaving home. See Chapter 9, under Volunteer Workfor
There are several benefits you will derive from doing this. It will
give you a great feeling by doing something to help others. It will
also broaden your networking base, which could lead to permanent,
full-time employment. I even read recently that someone's
volunteer job turned into a permanent, paid position. Volunteer
work may also make you stand out from the other applicants if
you list it on your résumé. An employer may be quite impressed
to see that you are interested in making your community a better
place to live and work.
Sometimes volunteer work provides more of the skills an employer
is looking for than your paid work experiences. However, avoid
using "volunteer" on your résumé as a job title. The adjective
"volunteer" does not fully convey the work you really accomplished.
If you did counseling, use the title "Counselor." Then, highlight
the skills you learned and determine what skills would be important
to the working world. Did you write grants? Do fundraising? Do
consulting work for businesses? Were you an administrative
assistant for a non-profit? Do not hold back from listing these
things, feeling they are unimportant. On the flip side, however,
do not overstate the things you did.
We talk more about this in Chapter 4, but you should also strive
to learn to manage your money intelligently if you don't already.
There are many books written on this subject as well as web
sites and money management counselors who may provide
advice. Money itself doesn't buy happiness, but knowing how
to use it properly and making it work for you can make you feel
10 feet tall!
Set some goals for yourself (on paper or using software see
Chapter 9). The beautiful part about it is you dont have to
stay stuck where you are. Decide what goals you want to
accomplish, then break each goal down into manageable steps.
Getting over the trauma of being laid off will not happen overnight.
But in order to regain your confidence after this experience,
please remember that you are a person of worth, job or no job.
This is only a temporary setback. You have the power and ability
to attain all your goals and ambitions in life. You just have to know
what you want and go after it. And let nothing stand in your way!
About 85% of the people working today don’t like their jobs, where their career is heading, and can’t figure out what to do about it! Maybe it is time to reexamine your life, where it is headed, and, what you can do about it!
Look at the Big Picture: Create a Master Plan for Your Life
No one wants to fail in life, but when we fail to plan our life, we
are setting ourselves up for failure, thus the saying "If you failed
to plan, then you plan to fail".
7 Ways to Reach Success At Any Stage of Your Career
There are 7 levels of knowledge and skills that you need to
reach success at any stage of your career.
This article is an excerpt from the book HOW TO SURVIVE AND
THRIVE AFTER A LAYOFF by Dolores G. Wix, available